1.kicked in the face by a horse: broken nose & cheek bone, plastic skull fragment and was in a comma for 3 days

2.slashed in a hockey game: broke both bones in my left arm, now have 2 plates in it

3.pissed off a bull: the fucker pushed me into a wall breaking 6 ribs

4.pissed off a bull again: the bitch dragged me through barbed wire resulting in many cuts across my left arm and chest

5.walked into a garage door: deep laceration needing 2 staples in my head

6.buddies car fell on me: cracked my chest cavity

7.fell out of a hay mow onto a cement pad and landed on my back: almost paralyzed myself and now i have a nerve ending that floats around the left side of my back

8.pissed off the wrong person: got stabbed in the lower right hand side of my stomach

9.wrestling match: craked my eye socket